Siblings, Donors, DSR and Oprah!
I have so many items to cover this week, but they will have to wait another day. I'll be sharing a brilliant start up, Brighter Planet, and the web-conference I took part in (all about carbon offsets, carbon footprints and conservation.) And I'll introduce you to an innovative new way to help boomers and 50 plussers get a virtual foot in the door through video-resumes at CV-Vision.
But all that is temporarily pre-empted today because of an exciting bit of news that flew into my email this morning...
As announced earlier this week, my mom released her new book "Cryo Kid: Drawing a New Map." One of the resources in the book is Donor Sibling Registry (or DSR). Headed by the dynamic Wendy Kramer, DSR evolved out of a desire and a need for donor offspring to connect and a desire from the anonymous donors themselves to contact their offspring.
I found out about Wendy after I'd had my daughter (by DI, or donor insemination -- long story, better buy the book!) I'd used the California Cryobank in order to find a donor, however, I hadn't had success finding out if my daughter had any siblings...or for that matter if her biological father would want to know about her. Out of the blue, someone mailed me a copy of an article...about the Donor Sibling Registry. I jumped online, donated my $40 for a membership, and searched out my donor. Imagine my delight when his number connected me to four moms and eight other siblings. The rest of the story is outlined in the book, but I contacted Wendy Kramer minutes after connecting with the first mom and we've stayed in touch from time to time.
I let Wendy know about the release of Cryo Kid, and coincidentally, she let me know that she was going to be on OPRAH (Friday, February 8th) specifically to look at donor fathers and siblings. My DVR is set up and ready to go.
The world is changing due to technology. No matter what anyone wants or believes, it is changing as fast (faster) than the internet changed our method of communication. I'm proud to say that I'm a supporter of DSR, one of society's changers. I'm proud to be connected to Wendy Kramer through her registry. She's a dedicated and enthusiastic warrior, and I'm delighted that she is getting the additional recognition this week.
3 comments:
Hi Wendy:
What a gift for you, your mom and daughter, after all these years, to be able to hook up with an instant extended family. Four moms and eight siblings! Wow! It will be fascinating to learn how you all connect.
While watching Oprah last night, I was delighted for the siblings and families who found each other. And felt the pain of those searching for the lost pieces of their puzzle. How raw and honest was the joy of the sister and brother who found another human who looked so much like themselves they could have been twins!
I'm excited and happy for you. I wish for all involved: warm encounters and strong, lasting connections.
And I can't wait to read your mom's book!
Judy Marcus, Memory Lady
Hi Judy,
Thanks for your kind words. There are so many definitions of family and I've personally found that a child brought up with love becomes a loving, fulfilled person. That is more important than how they came to "be" in the world.
There are also many dissenting voices -- on the comments page on Oprah, many people hold to the traditional family model so tightly that they don't allow room for any alternate structure.
What I do know is that no woman enters into the world of assisted reproduction without a great deal of thought. This is not the same as meeting Mr. Goodbar and ending up as a single mom. It is a choice that requires a great deal of deliberation and I proudly support any woman or man (many men with fertility problems also turn to DI as a means to having a child with the woman they love) who follows this path.
I realize I've got another entire post coming, so thank YOU, Judy, for bringing your thoughts to the table.
Wendy
For any readers who are interested in learning more about the Memory Lady, Judy's site is www.memorylady.com and her blog is www.memory-improvement-tipster.com.
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